My Tapping Journey with HER2+ breast cancer (Part 3)

Link to Part 1 and Part 2

Having completed chemotherapy and surgery, the next step was radiation. The radiation oncologist asked me to undergo radiation for 15 consecutive days, with breaks only on the weekends. I was still grappling with unprocessed grief about the cancer when the radiation began.

I remember the first day being very uncomfortable. They prepared me for radiation by having me lie down without moving while they made the cast.

I tapped and managed to calm myself during the preparation.

I realized that immobility made me anxious.

I was then taken for a CT simulation scan, which is used to map the treatment area and help the radiation team plan exactly where the radiation beams will be directed. Small markings were placed on my body to ensure consistent positioning throughout the treatment course.

Because my cancer had been in my left breast, close to the heart, I was taught a technique called Deep Inspiration Breath Hold (DIBH). During treatment, I would take a deep breath and hold it for short periods while the radiation was being delivered. Expanding the lungs in this way temporarily increases the distance between the breast tissue and the heart, helping reduce the amount of radiation exposure to the heart. Before beginning my radiation sessions, I had tapped on my fear of the radiation exposure and the possible long-term impact.

The next day was my first radiation session, and it was extremely uncomfortable.

Although the process itself was pain-free, the session lasted much longer than I had expected—almost 30 minutes. Being strapped down, unable to move, and held in one position was not easy. As a woman, the experience can feel especially vulnerable. Staying connected to my body at that moment was hard.

Having survived childhood sexual abuse (CSA) and having done a great deal of healing work around it, I honestly can’t imagine a woman going through this process without some discomfort. I’ve spent many years working through my trauma and have found recovery and strength, and yet this process triggered me immensely.

I felt deeply uncomfortable—not because of anyone around me, but because the immobility triggered remnants of trauma stored in my body. The technicians were professional, but they were not trauma-informed, and that made a difference.

I tapped on my fingertips throughout the process to manage the flood of emotions that kept coming up. Having to repeatedly hold my breath while the radiation was delivered in short intervals was challenging as well.

I tapped on:

“Even though that position makes me deeply uncomfortable and makes me feel exposed…”

“Even though it’s an ordeal, it will be over soon.”

After coming home, I sat down for an hour-long self-tapping session.

After several rounds of tapping on the emotions, I started getting some cognitive shifts. I also asked myself, “What can I do to support myself during this radiation treatment?”

“Even though I felt very uncomfortable during the radiation session, I would like to speak up calmly and gently, let the technicians know if I’m uncomfortable, and find ways to make myself more comfortable.”

After the third radiation session, I started feeling more comfortable and regulated.

What had changed was that I started letting them know, in a calm tone of voice, if I didn’t understand the procedure and what they could do to help me through the process.

My requests were simple: to put an extra blanket over my legs during treatment so I wouldn’t shiver, and to let me know when they were going to adjust my cast rather than doing it suddenly.

When I communicated clearly and calmly, the radiation team responded well, and I appreciated their promptness.

Slowly, I fell into the routine and learned to manage my breath while doing this. Mental tapping and singing songs in my head kept me going through the 15 sessions.

I found a spot on the right side of my vision – a white tile on the wall – where I would look during each treatment for the rest of the sessions. It became my anchor.

I would look at it and repeat statements in my mind:

“Even though this is so uncomfortable, it will be over soon.”

“Just a few more minutes.”

“You can do it.”

The side effects of radiation started after the treatment ended, just as the doctor had said they would. Intense itching, skin peeling, pain, and an inability to move my left hand comfortably became ongoing issues that I had to deal with for several months.

I kept tapping whenever I could.

I’m still dealing with some of the side effects, but they are much less now.

All along, tapping helped me stay the course of the treatment.